Just over a year ago I wrote a piece titled “My Life*”.  It was rather brief but it represented, pretty succinctly, my feelings at the time.  The main point was that Rees’ passing cast a shadow over everything I did and never seemed to fade.  A couple of days ago I re-read the piece, wondering if my perspective had changed in the year since I wrote it.  Interestingly, in writing about my feelings of that time, I posited that the future may hold something different; perhaps a way to shake the shadow and finally edit the asterisk from My Life* out of the narrative of my existence.  That future is now…

One year later and I can tell you that the asterisk is still there.  All the time.  390 days later I find that while I have come so far in some aspects of my dealing with Rees’ death, I … Read More

Click on the picture below to download a .pdf that you can give to your child’s teacher to let them know you purchased a copy of “A Little Rees Specht Cultivates Kindness” for them for next school year.  You can purchase your copy and put the teacher’s name and school address as the shipping destination.  Order HERE and then print out the .pdf below to give to your teacher to let them know!

This has been a whirlwind couple of weeks.  I really feel like I can’t tell which end is up – mostly because I find myself oscillating between extreme highs and lows.  It all started with our discovery of the baby’s gender and it really has not slowed down since.  We had our concert on June 6th, and while the music and performers were top notch, I found myself disappointed in the low turnout.  It was amazing to see the musical talents of my former students on display, all for the love of a little boy they never met.   I even had a chance to sing a song to my little man… a song made special by the teacher who inspired me to become a teacher myself.  You can watch my tribute to her and Rees here (I apologize to Josh Grobin for my awful rendition… I tried!).

I was so … Read More

To say the last 19 months has been a roller coaster ride would be the understatement of the century.  The first 5 or 6 months after we lost Rees was nothing but a blur.  I really can’t recall much at all from that time period, including how I felt at the time.  Thankfully I have the writings I posted to read over and gauge where I was in the time after April of 2013 , but since I really did not write much, except for “Why?”  in those first five months, I have no real reminder of where I was emotionally during that period.  I remember I was hurting – but I forget exactly how it felt.  I know there was a persistent knot in my stomach that would not abate – but it’s intensity no longer resonates.  I recall despair threatening to overwhelm me at any given time – … Read More